raindrops and sea lions, oct. 23, 2010

We haven't seen any sea lions here at Sea Ranch, but we have seen geese flying south in big flocks, some disoriented in the heavy fog and we've seen flocks of ducks, and on the beach we'veseen the gulls of different sorts. We've seen lots of deer too. It was eery. Pete and I went for a walk along the bluffs and we could hear the geese honking overhead but we couldn't see them. They were really loud and incessant, but we couldn't see them for the longest time. They approachced, flew overhead and then were gone. We tried our best echolocation techniques... turning our ears like the deer do... no luck. Other geese came and we were able to see them. One group was quite ragtag... wandering wiggledy-piggledy across the sky, looking rudderless. The next flock were better organized and oriented. I felt sorry for the first group. They seemed a bit lost and a little anxious. I attributed it to the fog.. that they just couldn't see where they were going! I woke up in the middle of the night, per usual, heard the rain coming down. Started worrying about something. Had the wits to start praying the rosary... which brought me back to .. what?... that I'm not in charge of the universe and maybe if I rest in the one who is.. I can get oriented. As Julian of Norwich is famously quoted as saying: All will be well and all will be well and all manner of thing will be well. Something like that. Peace be with you, another famous quote...

thursday, october 21, 2010

From Paul's letter to the Ephesians, kinda reminds me of Keats love poems:

and that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith;
that you, rooted and grounded in love,
may have strength to comprehend with all the holy ones
what is the breadth and length and height and depth,
and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge,
so that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.

.. I spent the morning on Tuesday w/ a Dominican sister who'd just come off a 3 week retreat. She was teaching us about her experience of the rosary. She was so still. At points, I thought she was going to start talking in a whisper and then just stop talking all together. It felt like she was pulling us INto her retreat, into the stillness of her quiet time of the past three weeks. It reminded me of why I need to be in the presence of religious men and women. Don't get me wrong! I also need to be with people who are movers and shakers. Cuz I'm a lug. But, being with Sr. Cecilia," rooted and grounded in love", helped me sense enfleshed what could be simply words. Her three week retreat blessed ME.

tuesday, october 19, 2010

Feast day of American martyrs.

from today's psalm 85:

Kindness and truth shall meet;
justice and peace shall kiss.
Truth shall spring out of the earth,
and justice shall look down from heaven.

My prayer for today:

that we shall see what the psalmist foretells.

and that Billy will have a cracking phone interview today and a bang up meeting on Friday in Portland. and for everybody in the whole world. Amen.

friday October 8, 2010

I spoke to our Egyptian post office clerk yesterday when I was mailing Robbie a bunch of reading material, including the sample ballot for the upcoming election. I had just finished reading a book by Rosemary Mahoney entitled Down the Nile. I enjoyed this book. I have no familiarity with Egypt and her experience rowing a boat down a stretch of the Nile and her interactions with the natives was really fun for me. I, too, love rowing a boat, so I could appreciate her desire for this experience. Anyway, back to the clerk. He said he grew up in Alexandria, went to college there and was one Christian among many Muslims. He worked there before coming to America, where he said everyone wants to come. He shared that his coworkers didn't work very hard because they kept taking time off to pray to Allah. They would leave the office and wind their way to the mosque and then pray for 5 minutes and then wind their way back to work. They were gone for an hour. Mostly they stood around, smoking and chatting with their friends. Then, they would criticize him for not praying... or for praying to a prophet, Jesus. He also shared how beautiful Egypt is.. and that I should put it at the top of my travel destinations list. He can't go home this year because air fare is so expensive and because his relatives expect him to bring gifts for all of his nieces and nephews. He is the rich uncle. Back to the religious life... didn't Jesus say don't make a show of your praying to the Father? ... maybe he knew that it was a temptation and that it really doesn't help the relationship. Like kids who brag about being friends with the popular kid. The friendship will be evident .. because people will have seen you hanging out, sharing similar interests, etc. I'm not picking on the Egyptians here... and another thing: the dominant culture raises its eyebrow at difference... and of course, assumes that its way is THE way. I'm gonna be on the lookout for the ways that I am complicit in either of these temptations. For starters, I am NOT going to sign my kids up for soccer this year. SCORE!!

simplify, simplify, simplify

Reading Fr. James Martin's book and the chapter on Simplicity or Poverty, actually. Simultaneously, our women's group is taking a look at the Beatitudes... and yesterday, the one that goes: Blessed are the poor in spirit (Matthew's version) or Blessed are you poor (Luke's version) the difference explained by the communities to whom Matthew and Luke were preaching. Matthew's audience were likely house churches who didn't know poverty themselves and Luke's audience would have known poverty. So, for what that's worth... I'm pondering if I see myself as poor. and thinking about how when I am aware of my poverty, how I do feel blessed, because it is then that I am most aware of my right relationship to all things, including the Creator. Well, truth be told, my poverty doesn't often feel good to begin with, but if I sit with it and really own it, and dig deep I can wind my way to the truth: that my identity lies in my status as a child of God. Nothing more, nothing less. Then I can lean on the Father and trust that essentially... all is well. I'm always struck that when missioners remark on their experiences with the people to whom they minister, that they always say how happy the people are... that yes, their struggles are great, but there is a simplicity and an integrity and beauty in the people they serve. Aileen, my sister in law, who went to Haiti imm. after the earthquake there was overwhelmed by the Haitians grace. She LONGS to go back to be among them. (She goes in Feb.) Father in heaven, help me to know your companionship... to welcome your friendship that knows me most deeply as your own blessed daughter. A-men-ay. (That's for you Robbie!!)

slow down October!

It's the third of the month already. My birthday is in 12 days. Looking out my window I just saw a swirl of leaves lift up into the air and be blown across the street and into the neighbor's bushes. The fog is in over the hills. The sky is grey allowing the true colors of the vegetation to stand. My sister posted a verse from the second reading for today's mass. She's in Maryland and has already been to church. From Jennie: "Loved the second reading. 'For God did not give us a spirit of cowardice but rather of power and love and self control'." I lay awake last night trying to compose in my head a letter to our neighbors alerting them to the fact that some mysterious person vandalized our car parked in the driveway. I visualized each of our neighbors in their homes.. who lives in their household... what their lives are like. What would it be like to receive a notice like the one I propose? I was up in the night.. padding around in the street at 1 in the morning checking the status of our other cars parked on the street. All was quiet. Except for our neighbor's television whose laughter I could hear through her living rm window. The night before there allegedly was police action at the end of our street and I know our immediate neighbors were having a pot smoking circle in their back yard. It was a wild Friday night. So, what would be my goal in circulating this notice? Just to connect the neighborhood. I think I'll call the Lafayette police and ask if they can come talk to some of us and advise us on neighborhood watch stuff. Can't hurt, right? and we might even TALK to our neighbors in the process.

friday,october 1, 2010

Feast of St. Therese of Lisieux.

from today's readings and Psalm 139:

LORD, you have probed me and you know me;
you know when I sit and when I stand;
you understand my thoughts from afar.
My journeys and my rest you scrutinize,
with all my ways you are familiar.
R. Guide me, Lord, along the everlasting way.
Where can I go from your spirit?
From your presence where can I flee?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I sink to the nether world, you are present there.
R. Guide me, Lord, along the everlasting way.
If I take the wings of the dawn,
if I settle at the farthest limits of the sea,
Even there your hand shall guide me,
and your right hand hold me fast.
R. Guide me, Lord, along the everlasting way.
Truly you have formed my inmost being;
you knit me in my mother’s womb.
I give you thanks that I am fearfully, wonderfully made;
wonderful are your works.

I can't help but sing when I read this psalm... because we sing a song with these words at church. I remember when I first heard those words "knit me in my mother's womb"... wow! i just didn't happen. I was KNIT. Everything about this psalm speaks of the closest friendship with the Creator. We are no accident. We are the precious sons and daughters of the Mother and Father of the Deep and the High and of Infinity (as the boys used to conceptualize). I'm gonna sit with this notion of the bombshell that is our creation... as I did when each of our boys were fashioned and born. Someone had each of us in mind, and that Someone longs to know us and to be known.