This is a statue of a young Mary, mother of Jesus, in my parents' parish, Mother Cabrini in Littleton, CA. She looks like a woman of action, doesn't she?

From Today's psalm reading, no. 34: "The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; and those who are crushed in spirit he saves." I have a friend who is receiving treatment for a rare auto immune disease. He's gone to Chicago to receive it and has had stem cells removed while he receives chemotherapy. The stem cells will be returned to his system and he will have to re build an immune system. from scratch. Our friend, Jim, is a searcher! In college, he drove his motorcycle to Washington state to see an eclipse, because that was the best vantage point from which to see it. He asked us if we wanted to go and I'm sure we just stared at him. Uh, we were gonna go to class and team practice. He had built and set up a giant telescope on the roof of his dorm. We went to his wedding back in the 80's. He joined the Air Force and was a fighter pilot, having somehow gotten around the color blind test. He was color blind. Fast forward: he has three children (one named Katie) and is separated from his wife. He has retired from the USAF and is now working with his brother in real estate. He ran/power walked a marathon last fall and immediately experienced symptoms that led him to the diagnosis of this disease. It came on fast and furiously.

I asked him (via Facebook) how he was doing. He is living temporarily in an apartment high above Lake Michigan with two women who also are coping with this same disease. They are angels!! They take him to his appointments and generally take care of him as they are further along in the treatment and are on their way to health. Jim shared that he does believe in the power of prayer.. and that he's doing a lot of it himself. So bring it on!! he says. After the Super Bowl , he wrote "you can DROP KICK me into the loving healing arms of touchdown Jesus ! I am just so lucky and grateful to have loving friends like you. I just feel so grateful - this illness - has been the biggest blessing of my life. I think you know what Iam saying!" "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted." I am so grateful.

Feast of the Chair of St. Peter, Feb. 22

From today's psalm reading: "Even though I walk in the dark valley I fear no evil; for you are at my side With your rod and your staff that give me courage." I'm trying to imagine being a sheep or a lamb and looking to my shepherd to protect me. What must it be like to feel that you are being tended like that? Am I being looked out for in that way? I have a doctor who cares about me. I have a spiritual director who cares about me. Both give me good advice. I have a pilates instructor who is knowledgeable and a great teacher. Pete's been leading us in our effort to eat better and exercise. I have one friend who is quick to challenge me if I'm using fuzzy logic or making excuses for bad decisions. She's an engineer and doesn't tolerate soft thinking. These are some of the people who shepherd me. I seldom am challenged to dig deep for a spiritual shepherd. Generally, my circumstances allow me to float along ... but it's Lent and now's my chance to do that considering. Where am I called to seek pastoring? a little re-direction provided by a shepherd's crook or staff? Oh, I know.. I'll take the answer off-line. My conscience just kicked in!! I'm thinking there must be a reconciliation opportunity coming up.

For all shepherds, that they may be sustained in their duties.

ash wednesday, feb. 17, 2010

From Paul's letter to the Corinthians: "In an acceptable time I heard you, and on the day of salvation I helped you. Behold, now is a very acceptable time; behold, now is the day of salvation." I'm reminded of a Pete Seeger song from the book of Ecclesiastes: "Turn, turn, turn. For every season, turn turn turn and a time to every purpose under heaven." The birds are singing outside and the sun is shining and it feels like spring. We have daffodils in full yellow bloom. It's Lent! Evidently, the word "lent" comes from an old English word which means "spring". As it happens, it is springtime here where I live. Not according to the calendar, but judging from the warmth, the sun, the birds nesting and the bulbs blooming. My world seems to be turning toward the sun and towards life. Our faith tradition calls me/us to turn to life. (and life in abundance, as Jesus promised.) So, today? I will turn my face to the sun and seek God's blessing so that I can take up my cross knowing that others are doing the same. God bless this Lent.

tuesday, mardi gras.. fenton's here we come!

From Mark's gospel reading for today, February 16, 2010: “Why do you conclude that it is because you have no bread? Do you not yet understand or comprehend?Are your hearts hardened? Do you have eyes and not see, ears and not hear? And do you not remember, when I broke the five loaves for the five thousand, how many wicker baskets full of fragments you picked up? "They answered him, “Twelve.”“When I broke the seven loaves for the four thousand, how many full baskets of fragments did you pick up?” They answered him, “Seven.” He said to them, “Do you still not understand?” I'm sure there is a lot here that I don't understand, but what struck me on first reading it is that Jesus sees that the disciples haven't yet seen what is at work as they are asked to feed people. What is at work? A recurring theme in my own theology rooted in my reading of the gospel and in my observation of life is that when people come together and in faith, good will and willingness to be selfless for the sake of a greater good, miracles do happen. When i rowed for women's crew in college, (we were a motley crew) I experienced this. We were a group of real personalities, but we sacrificed for the sake of the team, and we grew to love eachother and on a few occasions? we MOVED that boat. It was an out of body experience and we even managed to beat PAC 10 schools, including UCLA and USC. When people give it their all... great things happen. BUT, the cause has to be worthy of us, our dignity, our goodness. An aside: Parker Palmer talks about nonviolence as "honoring, through our actions and words, the integrity and dignity of the other." I will try today to sinc up these two observations... that I am seeking a way to be part of an effort to feed the world while honoring the dignity and integrity of others. and in particular, to ask: where am I called to do that?

Feb. 10, 2010 wednesday

Feast Day of St Scholastica (480 - 547) She was born in Nursia in about 480, the twin sister of St Benedict. She was dedicated to God from an early age and followed her brother to Cassino, where she died in about 547. When I was little, my mother would call me "Sr. Scholastica", which was not meant as a compliment. I never knew who Scholastica was, but her name had a ring to it. I was to gather that she was a little holier than thou and that I "should come off it." My parents (i.e. mother) were afraid that I'd become a nun. I think they observed the religious sisters in various communities and just saw how hard they worked and how joyless, how unrewarding it appeared. More about Scholatica from Wikipedia: "The most commonly told story about her is that she would, once a year, go and visit her brother at a place near his abbey, and they would spend the day worshiping together and discussing sacred texts and issues.One year at the end of the day, they had supper and continued their conversation. When Benedict indicated it was time for him to leave, she protested, and begged him to stay with her for the evening so they could continue their discussions. He refused, insisting that he needed to return to his cell. At that point, Scholastica closed her hands in prayer, and after a moment, a wild storm started outside of the guest house in which they were housed. Benedict asked, "What have you done?", to which she replied, "I asked you and you would not listen; so I asked my God and he did listen. So now go off, if you can, leave me and return to your monastery." Benedict was unable to return to his monastery, and they spent the night in discussion."

I love this story. In order for this woman to get what she wanted, she implored God's intervention. Hmmm. Is this kosher? I'm going to interpret it to mean, as in many cases with women and men, that Benedict's sister knew the better choice. She had to elicit help to persuade her brother of the rightness of her idea. I think it's funny that she had to summon a storm. She knew that their togetherness would yield good things. (in fact, I believe the story goes that she died three days later. Maybe she knew that their time together was going to end soon.)

I've been trying to follow the Liturgy of the Hours that St. Benedict developed for his monks (and Scholastica's nuns likely followed too). and I've been reading up on monasteries around the country. Maybe my mother was right to worry.

February 6, 2010

Picture: Christmas gift Apple Tree 2009 from Mike and Aileen.

Feast of St. Paul Miki and Companions (d. 1597) He was born in Japan between 1564 and 1566. He joined the Society of Jesus and preached the gospel to the Japanese people with great success. When a persecution of the Catholics arose he was arrested together with twenty-five others. Mocked and tortured, they were eventually taken to Nagasaki on 5 February 1597, bound to crosses and speared.

I am frightened by the passion of another, but I am also inspired and awed. When I was a student at the Dominican School of Philosophy and Theology back in 1982, I met a fellow student from Viet Nam. He told me his story which culminated in his desire to become a priest. He was one of a large family who had years earlier escaped Viet Nam in a boat. All I remember is that his escape involved being at sea for a long time. Eventually, his travels brought him to Berkeley and the Graduate Theological Union. When I met him he was in his late twenties, but he looked older. He smoked a lot of cigarettes and drank a lot of coffee. He was full of life (nicotine and caffeine, too) and passion about his vocation. He spoke with enthusiasm and joy. I can't remember any theological discussions we had, but I remember his energy was "forward moving". I wish I could talk to him now and learn where his journey has taken him since his days as a student. What prompted this memory is that I was trying to imagine the face of St. Paul Miki as he last spoke to the Japanese people ... the face of a man who followed and died for Jesus. In the face of real persecution and the threat of death, these men remained faithful to their call. Where in my life am I challenged to remain faithful? As my mother used to say, "it's not good to compare!"... so I won't compare my circumstances to these men's. I will take inspiration though from their conviction and their sacrifices and TRY to keep putting one foot in front of the other in my circumstances.

feast of st. agatha, feb. 5, 2010

Today is the feast of St. Agatha, virgin and martyr, who died in the year 251 in Sicily during the persecutions of the emperor of the time. She is the patron saint of fire because she is credited with stopping the eruptions of Mt. Etna. The gospel from today's readings is the story of the beheading of John the Baptist. This reading is seen as a prefigurement of what is to come for Jesus. Because he will be the victim like John. While Herod, it is said, liked to hear what John said, he was perplexed. Like I am when I hear Jesus' parables and look at his life, I am perplexed. You mean, you want me to do what?

feast of st.joseph of Leonissa (1500's) feb. 4

Prayer makes no sense apart from a genuine trust in God. Though it remains true that none of us may have a sure grip on how prayer works, a belief in it defines us as Christians. When illness strikes, when someone loses a job, when a marriage is in trouble, when a teenager seems headed for disaster, when an accident worries us, we pray. We trust that in some way and some how God will help. Our trust does not mean we have to expect God to change the laws of the universe; it may be something much more subtle. Perhaps as a result of prayer I or someone for whom I pray learns how to deal with some disaster or huge worry. We are probably better off in the long run not trying to figure out what God might or should do and instead trusting that God has ways of which we know so little. Jesus says: "I give you my assurance. Ask and you shall receive, that your joy may be full" (John 16:24).

— Don Talafous, O.S.B.

This was part of Bro. Don's reflection this morning. I'm not sure what prompted this reflection, because the readings today were about other things. The gospel for today has Jesus telling his disciples to go out two by two as they hit the road to preach the good news. He also tells them to travel light. I am caught by the wisdom of advising his disciples to take a friend. I subscribe to the "buddy system". It is always good to have someone to share your woes and joys with as you travel through life, whether you're hiking in the Appalachians or putting in an attic fan. Jesus must have known that there would be times when any one of us would experience discouragement/despair and would need a friend to buoy us. There would also be times when we would need another body to hold our elation when good things happen. (I've actually shared good news with the Safeway checker out of my need to spill.) and I remember learning from the checker at Lucky's on Concannon St. in Livermore early in the morning about the plane crashing into the Twin Towers. I will never forget that. Perhaps, as the first apostles filled with the urgency of sharing the message of Jesus (too good to be true) were heading out, Jesus felt compassion for them, recognizing that they would meet resistance and hostility along the way and that they would need a friend. The friend would say: "remember when Jesus healed the leper? remember when Jesus stood with the Samaritan woman at the well and offered her salvation?" It is easy to forget that God is here waiting to love us when the experience of the moment discourages us. It is then we need to reach out to a friend who does remember...